As I was browsing the internet today, specifically tumblr, i realized that most of the posts that have the most notes are those that are about love. I have nothing against love, it's a beautiful thing. Everyone wants to feel it and express it. However, most of the things i saw are about how to know if a person really loves you...like REALLY. I have been there before. I had a boyfriend and all i do every single day is to assess if he still loves me because if he doesn't, he doesn't deserve me. Whenever he does not meet my expectations, i would assume that he is getting tired of me and he doesn't love me enough anymore. I promised myself that i would never burden anyone in a relationship. So every month, i would try to break up with him. He would ask me why and i will just say that i think he is taking me for granted, or that i think he is just obligated to the 'boyfriend stuff', and that basically, i am just a burden to him. He, on the other hand, would also feel unloved and tell me that my friends are more important to me and that i am happier with other people and stuff like that.
After the (final) breakup, i decided to look back and analyze every single thing in that relationship. Why it didn't work, why did i feel relieved of something, why, why, why...
I realized one thing, both of us have been too focused on checking each other if we are still in love and yet we failed to ask ourselves if we are.
So now, whenever i meet a guy, i don't ask him if he still enjoys my company or if i'm special to him. I ask myself instead. Do i still like him? Do i enjoy his company? Do i show him what he really is to me? I don't care how he feels anymore...ok, i still do, but not as much as i care how i feel towards him. Instead of assuming what he thinks about me, i evaluate myself and learn for a fact if i am still into him and if i am going in the other direction, i ask myself why. Is there anything that can be done to save it? If yes, then i do it then and there. I make the choice to grow with him. If none, then i know it's time to let go.
Letting someone know how you feel towards them is your sole responsibility. If he told you he loves you once, then believe until the time that he takes it back. How he feels is beyond your control. All you can control is your own feelings. Because there is no amount of explanation that could make up for lost love.
So lovers, don't waste your time demanding from your partner to prove his/her love to you. Just know know for a fact that you are still in love with him/her and are committed to staying in love.
Stop asking, "do you still love me?" (okay, except on special occasions and the moment calls for it).
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